“Mmmph yrsh,” you mumble in reply as you hastily swallow your unchewed food. Leave it on, it will drive you nuts. Tear it off, it will bleed and sting. Ah yes, the great equalizer of humanity. This person will be seated next to you at the party. He’ll probably also chew with his mouth open. Of course, you won’t notice till you have your legs comfortably stretched out into the middle of the circle you’re sitting in.
I think I was born into the wrong family. Athleticism seems to come easy for most of them. I have a sister who can whip any girl around in softball (and some of the guys too), and brothers who seem to shine at any sport they try. I also have brothers who lived hours away from the nearest road, and who climbed up and down the steep mountainsides faster than the people who grew up in that village. Even my mom…
“So, what are we doing exactly?” I asked Lyn. “I’m really not sure myself,” she replied, as we travelled the long road to our mysterious destination. It started like this: I heard whisperings that there was a random lady who wanted to give away free facials. She was trying to do a certain number each month, and through some twisted grapevine, she had offered to do facials for Lyn and I and a friend. What a goodhearted lady, it seemed,…
Hugs so awkward you end up patting the recipient’s stomach. Not that I have EVER done that. Ahem. *Whistles innocently* Being the first to write in a group birthday card, and knowing that everyone else is going to read what you wrote. Public bathroom stall doors, if you’re over five feet tall. Falling asleep during prayer as an insecure adolescent visiting a new church. Having the local adolescent laughingly point out a wet spot of drool on the pew. Finding out…
A couple years ago, in better days, Mocksville’s center square was graced with four massive, majestic, old trees. They were stately and beautiful, and gave the town a sort of grace unknown to other concrete metropolises. They were filled with lights during the winter, illuminating the square with Christmas magic. In summer they shaded our cars and our town festivals, and brought green relief from the asphalt heat. In short, we loved them. Then The Person In Charge gave the…
Guest post by Philip, written from a tiny airplane seat. Dirge in an Airplane Aisle Ladies and gentlemen, we gather here today, To put this large and awkward duffel bag away, That young man struggles with vigor and vim. Note that he is trying, and be patient with him. The audience grows, the crowds in the aisle, Behind the dimensionally inept boy begin to pile. Work harder, young lad, if you push hard enough, Your duffel bag just…
Weather. It’s the one thing in life that is inevitable, yes? Rain, Sunshine, Cold, Heat, Clouds, Wind…we know the cycle. It’s been the same our whole lives. And yet. Weather is the one single thing that people complain about, All. The. Time. As one friend commented recently, you’d think we would realize that every winter it is going to be cold, and every summer heat waves will come, and each and every day will either be sunny or cloudy. But…
I was rummaging through old pictures and thought I would share with you The Evolution Of My Family. Perhaps someday I’ll terrorize bless you with even earlier pictures than these. But for now, enjoy.
Remember when I said I’d tell you about our flopped beach trip? Well, here you go. We have a long-standing tradition of renting the same little cabins every time we visit Tela, since they’re private and cheap, off the beaten track, and the cook that owned them was amazing. However, they seem to have gotten a little run down since the original owner died and left his son in charge, a fact we were going to discover thoroughly. Our first evening…
Ah, the side hug. First off, who invented this thing? As a tall girl living in a short, side huggy world, I have a score to settle with that person. Truth be told, sometimes side hugs are inevitable, due to expectations or culture or other people’s preferences. And most of the time they work great, when the huggers have normal heights. But then there are those times when a shortish sort of guy is greeting a towering sort of girl,…
Go to the Dollar Tree. This is very necessary, for obvious reasons. Buy some of the less plastic looking bunches of leaves, leaf garlands, and some spicy candles for good measure. Go home and paw through the stuff you already own. Pull out things like old books, those wooden candle holders you know you have stashed somewhere, and other things that look somewhat autumnish. Maybe collect a few sticks or berries outside as well, if you live in the country. Throw the…
This morning I unearthed a story I wrote when I was probably ten or eleven. Back story: when we all still lived at home, my dad bought a big yellow school bus, and together with my brothers, converted it into a custom motor home, just right for taking all nine of us to Costa Rica and back in a trip spanning five months. It was the adventure of a lifetime, complete with walking to church in gumboots because it was so…