{"id":6485,"date":"2018-07-05T08:00:05","date_gmt":"2018-07-05T12:00:05","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/?p=6485"},"modified":"2018-08-10T14:56:25","modified_gmt":"2018-08-10T18:56:25","slug":"a-guide-for-the-average-mennonite-who-wishes-to-be-less-average","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/?p=6485","title":{"rendered":"A Guide for the Average Mennonite Who Wishes to be Less Average"},"content":{"rendered":"

Jobs to have besides working in the minibarn industry:<\/h3>\n

Be a florist.<\/p>\n

Try interior design.<\/p>\n

Do mosaic tiling in kitchens.<\/p>\n

Be a cardiothoracic surgeon.<\/p>\n

Be a janitor for the cardiothoracic surgeon.<\/p>\n

Drive a school bus.<\/p>\n

Design hair bows to sell on Etsy.<\/p>\n

Write guidebooks for obscure places nobody has thought to review, such as the tiny little town of Mocksville, NC.<\/p>\n

Be a chef. Become world famous for your taco-making skills.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Topics of conversation to discuss besides minibarns and volleyball:<\/h3>\n

A Grief Observed<\/em>\u00a0by C. S. Lewis. If you haven’t read it, read it and then discuss it with me, pretty please.<\/p>\n

The purpose of marriage.<\/p>\n

Short term missions- does the good outweigh the bad or not?<\/p>\n

The merits and downsides to required professional dress.<\/p>\n

Feminism.<\/p>\n

Manipulation versus tact in conversation, and where the line lies.<\/p>\n

The greatest weaknesses and strengths of our plain background.<\/p>\n

Tacos.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Sports to play besides volleyball and ultimate frisbee:<\/h3>\n

Soccer (oh yeah!)<\/p>\n

Badminton<\/p>\n

Rugby<\/p>\n

Croquet<\/p>\n

Tap dancing<\/p>\n

Tennis<\/p>\n

Extreme ironing. It’s a thing.<\/p>\n

Taco eating competitions. (It should be a thing.)<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Foods to eat besides mashed potatoes and coleslaw and jello salad.<\/h3>\n

Korean barbecue which is a sensory delight.<\/p>\n

Macarons in every flavor possible. If they come directly from Paris, even better.<\/p>\n

Dumplings from the food court in the Flushing mall, NYC. Or even better, the insanely good dumplings my sister-in-law<\/a> makes. Only, it takes special privileges to acquire those.<\/p>\n

Currywurst<\/a> because it is the ultimate comfort food and also, it matches the German heritage you probably have as a Mennonite.<\/p>\n

Jalapeno cranberry relish over cream cheese with crackers.<\/p>\n

Uh, tacos of course.<\/p>\n

<\/h3>\n

 <\/p>\n

Places to vacation besides Pinecraft, Florida:<\/h3>\n

Literally, anywhere.<\/p>\n

Have you thought about visiting a Louisiana bayou and trying Cajun food?<\/p>\n

Stay on a rocky shore in New England and fall asleep to the waves crashing on the shore.<\/p>\n

How about a stay in the middle of San Diego, eating only tacos<\/a> the whole while?<\/p>\n

Feeling more adventurous? Try the Patagonia. (Seriously, google pictures.)<\/p>\n

Go ziplining over the Copper Canyon.<\/p>\n

Make friends with an elephant in South Africa.<\/p>\n

\"\"
Handsful. Handfuls? Hands full? I’m afraid I’ll never be un-confused by this.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

So there ya go. If you do all these suggestions, I can assure you, “Average” will never again describe you.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

A Year Ago:<\/h3>\n

Asheville, My Love<\/a><\/p>\n

Two Years Ago:<\/h3>\n

My Life Plan (per Lyn)<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Jobs to have besides working in the minibarn industry: Be a florist. Try interior design. Do mosaic tiling in kitchens. Be a cardiothoracic surgeon. Be a janitor for the cardiothoracic surgeon. Drive a school bus. Design hair bows to sell on Etsy. Write guidebooks for obscure places nobody has thought to review, such as the tiny little town of Mocksville, NC. Be a chef. Become world famous for your taco-making skills. Topics of conversation to discuss besides minibarns and volleyball:…<\/p>\n

Read More Read More<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6500,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[90],"tags":[231,230,361,360],"class_list":["post-6485","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-humor","tag-cliches","tag-mennonites","tag-minibarns","tag-volleyball"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/img_4430.jpg?fit=1696%2C1242&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p8A8kG-1GB","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":7942,"url":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/?p=7942","url_meta":{"origin":6485,"position":0},"title":"Goodbye Philistine","author":"Rachel","date":"September 22, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Dear Friend,\u00a0 You know how often people who break up have to have one last little fling before they end things for real? You know, you\u2019ve broken up but you run into your ex by your bodega and he asks if you wanna get coffee and just catch up a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Humor"","block_context":{"text":"Humor","link":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/?cat=90"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/img_4140.jpg?fit=1200%2C645&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/img_4140.jpg?fit=1200%2C645&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/img_4140.jpg?fit=1200%2C645&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/img_4140.jpg?fit=1200%2C645&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/img_4140.jpg?fit=1200%2C645&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":8331,"url":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/?p=8331","url_meta":{"origin":6485,"position":1},"title":"Anti-Bucket List","author":"Rachel","date":"June 28, 2023","format":false,"excerpt":"I have the worst addiction to lists. Give me a blank google doc and a bunch of bullet points to fill and I\u2019m as happy as a clam. You know those people who would gladly make lists to organize their lists? That\u2019s me. I am those people. I also love\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Musings"","block_context":{"text":"Musings","link":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/?cat=91"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/06\/img_0813-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/06\/img_0813-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/06\/img_0813-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/06\/img_0813-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/06\/img_0813-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":3153,"url":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/?p=3153","url_meta":{"origin":6485,"position":2},"title":"Dealing With Small Talk","author":"Rachel","date":"April 28, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"I'm fine, thanks for asking. I am 5' 8\", maybe 9\". No, I don't play volleyball. I'm from North Carolina. I work in finance. Yes, the weather is beautiful. Now that we have that out of the way, can we get down to business? I dislike meeting strangers, and I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Musings"","block_context":{"text":"Musings","link":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/?cat=91"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/img_9091.jpg?fit=1200%2C808&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/img_9091.jpg?fit=1200%2C808&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/img_9091.jpg?fit=1200%2C808&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/img_9091.jpg?fit=1200%2C808&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/img_9091.jpg?fit=1200%2C808&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":4119,"url":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/?p=4119","url_meta":{"origin":6485,"position":3},"title":"The Single Years of The Good Mennonite Girl","author":"Rachel","date":"July 24, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"As soon as she gets out of school, 8th grade or 12th, depending on where she's from, she must get a minimum wage job at a bulk food store, bagging cinnamon powder and gummy bears and oats. Here she will learn valuable skills such as customer interactions, and how to\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Humor"","block_context":{"text":"Humor","link":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/?cat=90"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/img_1345.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/img_1345.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/img_1345.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/img_1345.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/img_1345.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1395,"url":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/?p=1395","url_meta":{"origin":6485,"position":4},"title":"How To Be a Good Missionary-Visitor","author":"Rachel","date":"December 6, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Wash dishes. I mean it, wash dishes all the time. Do your own laundry. Gladly eat the food they have on hand, but pass on that special treat they just got from the States that they feel obliged to share with you. And then go wash some more dishes. Don't\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Relationships"","block_context":{"text":"Relationships","link":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/?cat=92"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/cuppacoldwater.files.wordpress.com\/2016\/12\/img_8918.jpg?w=350&h=200&crop=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/cuppacoldwater.files.wordpress.com\/2016\/12\/img_8918.jpg?w=350&h=200&crop=1 1x, https:\/\/cuppacoldwater.files.wordpress.com\/2016\/12\/img_8918.jpg?w=525&h=300&crop=1 1.5x, https:\/\/cuppacoldwater.files.wordpress.com\/2016\/12\/img_8918.jpg?w=700&h=400&crop=1 2x, https:\/\/cuppacoldwater.files.wordpress.com\/2016\/12\/img_8918.jpg?w=1050&h=600&crop=1 3x, https:\/\/cuppacoldwater.files.wordpress.com\/2016\/12\/img_8918.jpg?w=1400&h=800&crop=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":5637,"url":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/?p=5637","url_meta":{"origin":6485,"position":5},"title":"Out With the Old, In With the New","author":"Rachel","date":"January 2, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"It's that time again- time to look back at the past year and remember what happened, and to make resolutions and plans for the upcoming year. I love remembering the previous year, and making lists of the good that happened, don't you? Let me start with the very beginning of\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Five Things"","block_context":{"text":"Five Things","link":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/?cat=87"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/IMG_9582.jpg?fit=1200%2C396&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/IMG_9582.jpg?fit=1200%2C396&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/IMG_9582.jpg?fit=1200%2C396&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/IMG_9582.jpg?fit=1200%2C396&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/IMG_9582.jpg?fit=1200%2C396&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6485","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6485"}],"version-history":[{"count":19,"href":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6485\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6744,"href":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6485\/revisions\/6744"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/6500"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6485"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6485"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.stripedpineapple.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6485"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}